All these years I have thought J-man's feet issues were because of his ankles or shins. I was so wrong! It seems his hips have a slight "deformity" which make his legs turn in. It is correctable (sp) with surgery, but I'm not sure I want to put J-man through it.
We go back to the Shriner's hospital in November to perform another test. This one will be really cool...
They are going to put little light balls on his joints and have him walk or perform other tasks. These lights will be captured by a camera and sent to a computer where they can evaluate what his body is doing. It kind of reminds me of the special effects for Lord of the Rings when they generated Gollum... (yeah... I can be kind of geeky).
J-man in really looking forward to this test. He loves anything to do with computers, so this is right up his alley.
He's so sweet and brave. He has decided he wants the surgery. I told him we will have to see what options/recommendations come from this. He doesn't understand that he will probably have to had rods inserted into his hips, that he will have to be in a body cast, AND that he will probably have to learn to walk all over again. I explained all of that to him and his eyes got bigger and bigger and bigger. But he didn't sway. He thinks something is wrong with him -- I mean they said he was deformed! -- and I have to keep assuring him that he is fine.
This "deformity" will not affect his quality of life. The doctor said he will not get arthritis from it, nor will it get any worse. Surgery is an option - not a requirement. I do NOT want to put J-man through the pain of surgery or rehabilitation for something that isn't necessary.
Am I being selfish? Should I allow a 12 year old to make that kind of decision?
I'm doing weird things with my banana.
4 years ago
6 comments:
Oh, wow Marni! That's a tough one.
I think it depends on the maturity level of J-man. And only you and your hubby can determine that. I know some 12 year olds who are very mature and capable, and others who act more like they're 7 or 8.
I would include him in the research and decision making process as much as you can. Ultimately I think the final decision will rest between you, your husband, and the doctors.
Good luck!
Yes that is a hard call to make, I agree that J man should be included in all the pros and cons and that he will be aware of the total procedure, if it was my son I guess I would hope he declined the surgery but it has to be for him to decide with the guidence from yourselves, not easy
wow - just when I thought I was having a tough time - NOT. My big question right now is what song we want playing when we have our first dance at our wedding reception. I have no advice Marni, but I am sure sorry this is something you have to deal with!
Since it's elective surgery and something that doesn't have to be done TODAY, why not wait until he's 16? That will give him a few years to think about it.
BTW, I thought about the Gollum sequence, too.
I agree with Beth -- advise him to wait a bit. He still has a lot of growing to do, so I would advocate him waiting until most of his major "growth spurt" is over before even contemplating any kind of surgery. Especially since it is something that is not medically (and urgently) necessary, and has the prognosis of the full-body cast and the months of physical therapy that it would involve.
Make no decisions one way or the other until the November appointment. This way, after you get the results of the test, the doctors will be better able to give you more accurate info about how to proceed.
Whatever you all choose together, as a family, we will support you all 100%!
Fantastic advice, ladies. Thank you SO much! I am anxious about November, and, for now, against the surgery. I will wait and see what the doctors say.
Hugs to you ALL!
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