See that lil' guy over there? Grimmy?
Remember I told you he was sick?
He has stage 5 lymphoma.
My big guy only has a couple of weeks.
Carl said he would have let them put him down the minute they told him it was cancer. He doesn't want to see the pain Grimmy will be having.
I couldn't do it. I was with Bug when the diagnosis came in and we both lost it. The thought of putting him down was too much to bear. I asked if he was in pain and the vet assured me he isn't - yet. We were told what signs to look for, and I promised Bug the instant I see one of those, we will do what needs to be done. He will not suffer.
So for now we are going to spoil him rotten. He took his first dose of Prednisone this morning and he has perked up a bit. He has an appetite so we are feeding him whatever he can keep down - eggs, boiled chicken. I went and got him canned food but he turned up his nose to it. Oh well.
I'm constantly on the verge of tears. I think about his silly faces... his grin... and it breaks my heart. He started his life so rough - we don't know his story because he is a rescue. We assume he was not given proper attention because the poor guy doesn't know how to "play" - so the thought that he will leave this world knowing he was part of a family that adored him brings some comfort.
I'm not sure how I will handle it when it happens. For now I just lay in the floor - he can't even jump on the couch any more - and whisper to him that I love him. That he means everything to his family and we will miss him.
I whisper "Grimmy Grim Grim - I love you"
And watch his sweet tail wag.
A Forced March in the Woods. Part 2
7 months ago