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Friday, December 21, 2007

You are crazy and you stink

Well, my trip home proved to be interesting today.

I got on the train at my normal stop and watched the other passengers board. There was one lady that caught my eye. She was a petite little lady with crazy, matted, dirty hair. She sat across from me and started emptying out her pockets and putting dollar bills in her purse. The entire time she was giggling up a storm. She had a vacant look about her but determined to get her bills just right and her wallet closed just right and her purse put back together just right. It was interesting to watch.

She got off the train in front of me. I got a whiff. Oh bless her - but did she ever stink! It was a mix of BO, pee, blood, dirt, sweat... you get it. It was bad.

I got around her and went upstairs to board the second train of my trip. The train wasn't due for a few minutes so I sat on a bench and took out my phone. I have games on my phone to pass the time.

As I was playing a guy came up to me and said something - I had my earbuds in listening to music - so I took them out and said "Pardon". He said "Hey, can I use your phone for a second? I need to call a friend of mine." I promptly told him "No. Sorry!" He got this look on his face - angry - and walked off. I felt bad, but this time of year? I can imagine coming home and telling Carl that I loaned my phone to a stranger at the MARTA station and he ran off with it. Yeah...

Anyhoo... as this exchange was taking place someone walked past to me and sat their bag behind me. Whoever it was opened a little present or package of some sort and squeeled with glee.I didn't pay much attention until I got a whiff. It was her. She was getting on this train, too.

I finished my game and walked to a little further down the platform. I didn't make it obvious - even though I don't think she would have realized I moved because of her.

I saw another gentleman pacing the platform. He was a short, portly gentleman with a Disney 25th Anniversary t-shirt on. He looked dirty but he also looked like he had just gotten off work.

My train came and I got on - hoping that stinky lady would get in another section. Unfortunately Disney dude got on and sat close to me. As much as I thought the lady stunk it was NOTHING compared to this dude. Pure, 100% body odor - as in hadn't had a bath in at least a year. It was bad. And he kept talking to himself and waving his arms around... or putting them on the back of his seat.

I swear by the time I got off the train I was nauseous. I kept my head turned like I was looking out the window but I couldn't escape.

Then walking down the stairs leaving the train they were BOTH in front of me. I didn't think I would make it out alive.

I hope I don't sound mean. I just wonder if crazy, homeless folks ever take baths. And will someone ever tell them that they smell? Thank heavens it wasn't summer! OMG!


eric said...

Did you hear Rod Serling doing a voice-over narration in your head? "Portrait of a woman named Marni in olfactory distress. The place? A train car. Its destination? The Twilight Zone."

Marni said...

TRUE so true!

Marni said...

Can I link now?

Biddie said...

I feel for you. Truly. I do. As someone that takes public transit everywhere, I get it.
Shawn has a friend that never wears deoderant. EVER. He says that it never works for him, so why bother?
Why bother?! Um, because you are a stinky effer (pardon me) and you hang drywall for a living. He ALWAYS stinks. Plus, he smokes about 3 packs a day, and bathing is optional.
He is nice guy, really, but I have benned him from my house. He smells so bad, that Shawn stinks when they work togther.
Yes, it is THAT bad.
Oh, and in the summer, he doesn't even wear a tshirt under his leather jacket.
Oh yeah, you read that right.
Like I said, I feel for you.
When I worked in the morgue, we put Vicks under our noses to combat the smell. Maybe you could try that if it gets bad enough. I am seriously thinking of carrying some around with me!

eric said...

Sure. I forgot to tell you last week.

Biddie said...

sorry, I meant to say that he is BANNED from my house, not benned.

Marni said...

Oh, Biddie! That is awful! And I knew you meant banned... giggle.

Teri said...

Maybe you should have given them $5 each to not sit near you.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

It would be nice to be loving and accepting of everyone, but I get nauseous when dirty people are near me too, and have a desperate desire to escape.

whatevergirl said...

lol...I sometimes think it would be a kind thing to let someone know they stink because maybe they don't know...But, I don't suppose it would matter if you told a crazy person they were crazy.

Canadian flake said...

As I was reading it, I was thinking how much worse they would have smelled if it had been summer..

ewwwwwwww...I feel bad for them..but I would have been wondering why the lady had all that money and couldn't buy herself some soap??

Guess that is mean of me..

klasieprof said...

Especially when there ARE places you can clean up!! Why just last week I stopped at the local McDonald's and there was what I assume to be a homeless woman washing her hair in the sink, and using the hand dryer to dry her hair. She was quite polite, and moved out of the way anyone needed the dryer.
The problem is....clothespins hurt your nose after just a couple seconds!!!
PEE UUUU!!...Having worked in the inner city...I KNOW exactly what they smelled forgot the stale wine smell, and rancid grease. ...yuck.

Burfica said...

Now imagine this. I know a girl/woman that isn't homeless, and has the means, but won't shower but once a week, and it HUGE (like almost 600lbs) swear to god. She only showers once a week or less, and the smell is sooooooooooo bad.

I always tell them we are busy when she wants to come over, cuz I can't get the stink out. I know that sounds mean. I'm a big girl too, but I would never let myself stink.

ccw said...

As a crazy person who is not homeless, I will say that I do not smell. However, catch me when the depression cycle hits and I can't make any promises. :)

That sounds like a horrible ride.