Dancing with the Stars - Ep. 1

I have to admit I have never watched an episode of Dancing with the Stars until last night. It never even appealed to me. So why did I start watching it? Other than the fact that the Amazing Race was moved to Sunday (so nothing is worth watching on Tuesday nights), I was curious to see Jerry Springer dance. Can't stand his talk show - if you call it that - but the thought of watching him dance was just funny to me.

So now I'm hooked. If you have never seen the show, a professional dancer is paired with a B (or C) list celebrity. Each week they perform different dances and three judges critique them. The judges try to be funny (like American Idol) and sometimes land flat. They are entertaining only because they take this stuff SO serious!

I really, really enjoyed the show! And guess what?! You get a breakdown of each performance. Right here! Right now! If you don't want to read further that is fine. See ya tomorrow. :)

If your curiosity is peaked then read on... and if you watched the show I would LOVE to hear your comments.

Last night the men did the Cha Cha and the women performed the Foxtrot.

Joey Lawrence: I never watched this guy in Blossom, but damn... he's HOT now! That bald head is just sexy. He could really move, but he needed to move his hips more. One thing that bothered me, however, was he kept licking his lips. Anybody else catch that? Not so hot.

Sarah Evans: Love her singing; she is probably my favorite female country music singer right now. She looked beautiful in her blue gown, but way too stiff. I kept saying "point your toes" but she wasn't listening to me. I wouldn't be suprised if she is gone tomorrow night.

Tucker Carlson: This was the funniest thing I have ever seen. It deserves a place on YouTube! Honestly - can this guy be any more white?!!! He didn't move a thing - reminded me of a frat boy doing a drunk dance to impress a chick and wasn't getting anywhere. To his credit, though, Tucker had a ball. He was smiling the whole time. That was charming. He should be the first one to go...

Monique Coleman: She was beautiful and graceful. Her facial expressions were a little "put on", but I think she and her partner did a great job. They are safe.

Emmitt Smith: All I can say is GO BOY! He had a ball and it was so much fun watching him dance. He is a natural and it was obvious he was enjoying himself. I love his smile and as one person said "It was like watching my teddy bear dance." He will make it close to the end.

Willa Ford: Who the heck is she? Her partner, Max, was HOT! I wanted to watch him. Not her. They did a great job and looked fabulous. She is a cutie pie with a great personality. She and her partner have great chemistry. It will be fun to watch them going forward.

Mario Lopez: He is so darn cute! Loved, loved, loved his performance. He moved those cute little hips, pointed his toes, and had the cutest dimples! He made me smile the whole time.

Shanna Moekler: Former Miss USA? I hope her talent wasn't dancing. She was OK, but I wasn't too impressed. Boring. Hope it gets better!

Harry Hamlin: Loved him in Clash of the Titans... dancing though? Another typical white boy dance. Stiff, uninspired, so obviously choreographed... yawn. As one judge said, it was too mechanical. He learned the steps, he needs to add some character.

Vivica A. Fox: She is beautiful although I didn't like her hair. Best performance of all the women. She was singing, moving, and having fun. She is graceful, sexy, and great to watch. It was really good!

Jerry Springer: They kept the headliner for last -- have to get the ratings somehow. Keep people watching that ONLY tuned in to see the most popular talk-show host on TV. He decided to do this show so he could learn to dance for his daughter's wedding. What a dad! He talked to his partner the whole time. but, God, what a cute performance. He is the type of guy that can make fun of himself. I loved his performance and he will go far only for the entertainment factor alone. Very, very funny and FUN performance. Jerry... Jerry... Jerry... Jerry...

Who is the winner? Right now I would say either Emmitt or Mario. Will I watch the entire season? I don't know. I will probably watch the performance shows, but skip the results show. It comes on Wednesday nights and - I'm sorry - I won't watch Dancing with the Stars and miss LOST. Not for a million dollars or a silly disco ball statue... nope. Won't happen.